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big sigh   —   A New York Moment

While out grabbing a late lunch today I was stopped in front of Grand Central station by two police officers. The sun was high and blinding me so I had been walking with my eyes heavily squinted and at first when the officers stopped me I thought I was in trouble for public endangerment. Turns out, it looks like I know where I'm going even with my eyes closed. I'm super cool.

"Excuse me ma'am?" the young Doogie police officer stepped in front of my path and lightly touched my arm. "Yes?" I say, curious yet still slightly annoyed that this man is making me talk to him AND that he touched my arm. "Can you tell me where the closest 4,5,6 train is?" the officer asks, his cop buddy standing off to the side looking straight at me, both with serious expressions on their faces. "Is this is a trick question?" I ask. I wanted to go on, to ask them aren't they supposed to know where all the train stations are? Aren't they supposed to know what's INSIDE Grand Central Station, especially if they're standing right in front of it? Isn't this supposed to be their city? Their beat? Don't you KNOW where all of the dark alleys and tiny corners of this city are? The fucking 4,5,6 train? Are you kidding me? How the hell did you get to Grand Central station anyways? Walk here directly from Idaho?

"No ma'am, it's not a trick question" the officer replies. I'm sure the expression on my face was one of confusion, disgust, and horror. I turn around and point at the giant looming building directly behind us, "Dude, Grand Central station", I say. "The 4,5,6 train is in Grand Central station", I say, jabbing the air with my pointing finger. The officers look at Grand Central and point along with me, "right in there?", they ask. "Right in there", I say. They both thank me and make their way through a pair of the building's massive doors.

I continued my walk back to the office feeling a complete lack of faith for my city's protectors. Realizing that they too were only human. That they get lost, ask for directions, and remember high school as if it was only yesterday, because for many of them, it was. I bet I'm at least three years older than him, I thought. I bet I'm a better aim with a gun, I thought. I could've totally kicked his ass, I thought.

At least I got to call a police officer 'Dude'.

Posted 1.19.2006 4:00:58 PM

Mr. Space wrote:
They were probably German spies dressed as police officers.
Posted 1/19/2006 4:22:25 PM
Botch wrote:
We must be vigilant against terrorists! In New York City, if you hear or see anything suspicious, don't keep it to yourself! Tell a .... police... officer...

Posted 1/19/2006 4:26:06 PM
Dad wrote:
I am pleased to see that your subconsious took you back to your younger days when target practice was part of your parental guidence and gun handeling was second nature; that's my girl.
A proud father.
Posted 1/20/2006 8:06:07 AM
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