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Toxic Cleaner Girl   —   Personal

There are few chores that I actually don't enjoy doing. For the most part, I love to clean, I love to organize, and I love to tidy. It could be argued that it's not the job of doing the chore, but it's the result you get afterward that I really love. I tend to be physically and mentally uncomfortable in dirty apartments. Their mess throws my mind into chaos and I cannot think straight. I don't function properly when I'm surrounded by clutter and grime, even in places other than my own, so the act of creating the atmosphere in which I am comfortable, is not so unpleasant. But there are two things that I despise doing, and in order to avoid doing them, sometimes they get past the point of acceptable comfort. The first of which is putting away laundry. There's something about it that has the weight of a chore. It's boring, it's time consuming, and it bugs me. The second however, is just plain unpleasant. Cleaning the shower. I don't mind the cleaning part of cleaning the shower, it's everything else. The closed in quarters, the water, the fumes from industrial strength mildew and mold and soap scum remover. It's tiresome and actually painful. You get wet, you get cramped from bending and scrubbing. It sucks. Alot.

Last night I cleaned my shower. It was in desperate need of some lovin from a toothbrush and toxic chemicals, and that's exactly what it got. There's something in our water that creates the scariest-mildew-ever and it accumulates at a rapid rate so there is a certain amount of fear that overcomes me when I'm scrubbing certain parts of our shower doors. Over the weekend, in anticipation for such a cleaning, I bought a new shower cleaner, Scrubbing Bubbles Mildew Remover, thinking it would be less fumy than other shower cleaners I've used in the past. NOT SO. I spent maybe an hour cleaning the shower, and in this time I almost fainted from the fumes of this cleaner. I had the window open, the door open, and every 30 seconds sucked in a breath of cold fresh air from the window. After a while my lungs felt like they were bleeding, my nostrils were on fire, the skin on my face tingled. I scrubbed as fast as I could, realizing that the situation was probably not so safe, despite the cute and smiling bubbles present on the front of the cleanser bottle.

Finally finished with my scrubbing, a sparkling white tub and tile gleamed back at me, happy that I suffered for its benefit. I cleaned up my mess and went to (sigh) put away my laundry, and that's when the wheezing began. I didn't feel short of breath but there was a squeak when I inhaled and a wheeze when I exhaled. Then I started to cough. Uncontrollable fits of coughing. I opened the windows to relieve the suffocation I was now feeling, and after a hot cup of tea, I was feeling not so near death.

But this morning, and even well into the afternoon, I can still smell the shower cleanser, and I'm at work! It's like it seeped into my throat and lungs and every time I inhale I exhale toxic fumes. My throat is scratchy, the inside of my nostrils feel stripped of flesh and mucus, my lungs are hot. And I smell it. It's in my nose and with every breath I take it's there, taking over my senses and slowly turning me into a scrubbing bubble. I can feel it mutating my DNA even as I type this. Pretty soon, I'll be walking through walls and bleaching everything that I touch.

X-Men here I come.

Posted 3.21.2006 1:38:12 PM

Botch wrote:
We'll call you Disinfect Girl! Auntie Septic! Or how about Sterile Sheryl !!
Posted 3/21/2006 1:47:51 PM
Doll wrote:
What am I, a Garbage Pail Kid?
Posted 3/21/2006 2:13:51 PM
Dad wrote:
I never would have dreamed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But you were always daring.
Posted 3/21/2006 2:51:50 PM
VBOT wrote:
hippy cleaning that works


Posted 3/21/2006 7:08:10 PM
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