One order for an android kitty, please. — Cats!
Despite my bitching and moaning at times, life if pretty decent with Mr & Mrs. Alexander. It's true that it's in my nature to anticipate disaster. The fire that destroys our apartment and kills our cats, the robber that steals everything we've worked hard for, the disease that takes one of our lives, the illness that kills one or both of my cats, the job that is lost, and many more lovely instances that could happen at any moment and turn everything upside down. Most times I go through the day like a normal non-crazy person and these things are pushed to the very back and bottom of my brain. Usually the worries surface when going on vacation or when one of us is having a health trouble, or when one of the cats takes ill. It is then that I am fraught with concern, worrying myself into knots and balls, increasing the depth of my forehead frown lines. And when things get wonky it's usually days worth of one thing after another, until I'm convinced that little demons are following me around, laughing and pointing at my distress, and creating even more havoc in my life for their amusement.
More often than not it's one of my cats that sets things in motion. A week of constant diarrhea or daily vomiting. Labored breathing. Decreased or increased appetite. A cold. Constipation. Rapid heart beat. Dental surgery. Allergies. These are but a few of the shit that has happened and keeps happening to Commodore and Tsunami (mostly Tsunami). And every time, after hundreds of dollars of tests (blood tests, xrays, fecal tests, heart ultrasounds) everything comes back normal. We're left to draw our own conclusions based on what we know. This is hardly satisfactory but I suppose it's better than some horrible disease that we are left to deal with. A friend once said to me, "Pets are mini tragedies waiting to happen", and he's absolutely right. And for the amount of joy and laughter that they bring into my life, I often think to myself that after my boys pass on, that's it for me. No more. I guess only time will tell.
For the past few weeks Tsunami has had a heart rate of about double the normal speed. His breathing when at rest is so fast I can barely count to it. When he plays I fear his heart will instantly explode. When I come home from work I brace myself, expecting him to be in a coma or dead on the floor in a puddle of drool. He vibrates my leg when I sleep at night and I often push him off the bed because my worry keeps me up at night. His appetite is insatiable. After a meal he immediately wants more, and if I give him more he wants even more. When we went to the vet on Tuesday he had a fever of 103. We do an xray to see if his heart appears enlarged or if there is fluid around the lungs. The xray is normal. We do a complete blood work test to check for hypothyroidism, diabetes, and any other abnormalities in the blood. Everything came back normal. When Tsunami was a kitten he was diagnosed with feline herpes. When Tsunami was a little over a year old the vet said he has allergies and is slightly asthmatic. Tsunami is now three and back in March he was diagnosed with irritable bowels. When you picture this cat you probably picture a sickly skinny cat that's always sleeping. In fact, Tsunami is one of the most playful and oddball cats I've ever lived with. Despite all of his health conditions he always appeared no worse for wear. I suppose that's a good sign, but often times a confusing and frustrating one as well.
On top of this most recent cat health episode, Adam has an infection in his mouth and is now getting his wisdom tooth extracted. Our home PC shit the bed last night ... again. I have a quite painful sort of pain in my right foot that makes me hobble when I walk. Our sink is leaking. We might have bed bugs. I spent all of my money at the vets. And Tsunami needs dental surgery asap. He has two open sores in the right side of his mouth at the base of some teeth. Taking Tsunami to the vet is about as fun as getting a brick thrown into your face. His yowls and meows are deafening and often neighbors come out of their apartments to make sure someone isn't dismembering a baby.
But on the flip side no one is dying or has cancer and we're not homeless or unemployed so I guess things are pretty okay when you think about it. Considering the state of the rest of the world I'd have to say life is pretty fucking awesome because no one lost an arm while riding the bus or accidentally tripped on a land mine while walking to the watering hole. I know that despite American's hardships with disease, obesity, poverty, and crime, life on this side of the Atlantic is paradise.
Mr. Space wrote:
Like checking in on your 5-month old daughter every 20 minutes or so during her nap. While walking to the bedroom, flashes of face down or blue skin or something over her face or choking on vomit and my wife screaming in horror that our baby has stopped breathing. And she hasn't even started crawling yet.
Once upon a time there was a cat named Kee, she never had time to get sick cause she was always dodgeing me. Your kitties need some good ol lovin from grandpa, that will keep em healthy.
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