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A billion seconds old: insights on a marriage.   —   Notes from a Marriage

A glimpse into my marriage.

After spending most of the evening working independently on our computers Adam comes to my desk and mentions something in relation to Transformer comic books. I look at him with vague interest, sometimes when I hear the word "Transformer" my mind starts to fog over, much like I'm sure his mind fogs when he hears the word "cat".

He stares at me with his big excited eyes and says:

Adam: I don't know if you know this but, there's this thing, called a Transformer and ...
Me: Let me tell you, if I had a penny for every single time I've heard the WORD Transformer I'd be a rich woman.
Adam: Well, I don't know about rich, maybe better off than you are now. Let's say you've heard the word 5,000 times ...
Me: More like a million.
Adam: A million is a lot. A million is a huge amount. Let's say you've heard the word 10,000 times, that would mean you would have (he thinks for a moment) $100.
Me: God, pennies are worthless. Why do we even bother with them?
Adam laughs and goes back to the million bit.
Adam: Yeah, a million is really big. Like, how many days would a million seconds be? (He takes the calculator and punches in a few numbers) 11 days! It would take 11 days to experience a million seconds. That's a long time!
Me: uh-huh
Adam: I wonder how long it would take for a billion seconds to pass?
This time he doesn't use the calculator and just looks to the ceiling like he does when he's thinking.
Adam: 32 years! It would take 32 years for a billion seconds to pass! That's insane!
He looks at me and with eyes wide he says
Adam: You're not even a billion seconds old!!!

So there you have it ladies and gentlemen. I'm not even a billion seconds old. This snippet of conversation actually launched him into a longer one about really long numbers, anecdotes on some high school teachers, and what a googol is. That conversation, nay, monologue, started my uncontrollable laughing fit when I began comparing the length of Adam's rant about long numbers to the long numbers themselves and my, what I had thought to be fairly obvious impatience with the amount of time this subject was taking and his increasing enthusiasm on the subject in the face of my blatant disinterest. The best part was that when I began to quietly laugh, and then more forcefully laugh, Adam kept talking about numbers, getting more and more excited like my laughter was in response to something about a trillion. It was only when I slumped over my desk with tears running down my face laughing uncontrollably he stopped, silenced, put his hand on my knee and said, "Are those tears in your eyes?"

After gaining enough composure to speak but still unable to completely stop laughing, I was able to explain why it was that I had begun to laugh. Adam found this to be a riot as well and began laughing along with me.

Hot damn I love our marriage. Darling, you're the best. Mathematical rants and all. Especially the mathematical rants.

Posted 4.16.2009 11:41:51 PM

Botch the Husband wrote:
I try, I try. Educational, entertaining, and only a little tedious, that's me!
Posted 4/17/2009 12:01:12 PM - Botch the Husband's website
Mr. Space wrote:
Mark your calendar

Posted 4/19/2009 1:24:28 PM
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