The monsters, how they creep. — Macabre Mind
I've been having strange dreams these past few weeks. And I'm not talking my typical run of the mill zombies and apocalypse strange dreams, these are a different strange. Like a David Lynch movie on acid. The most recent one was about a trip to the candy store. I was paying a visit to my home town and I wanted to make a trip to the old drug store called, Ben Franklin, where I used to buy all of my candy when I was a kid. They had bins of penny and nickel candy, old fashioned kinds and new sparkley kinds, I'd buy a paper sack full. So, in my dream I go to Ben Franklin and when I enter the doors the store is suddenly out in the middle of no man's land and it's kind of turned into a farm house/barn/drug store. There's loads of people mulling about and it's fairly dark and quite dirty. I ask some stranger where the candy stash is hidden and he laughs and tells me to see the old man at the hay stack. When I find the old man and tell him I'd like some old fashion candy he grins and tells me that I have good taste. As he's scooping candy from a large barrel he tells me that the effects will wear off after a few hours but in the hours anything could happen so be careful. I look around and see for the first time that the people aren't people at all but they're monsters. Mutated versions of themselves with tentacles and too many eyes, big heads, tails, claws for hands, reptile skin. Everyone is different and they're all eating candy by the fist full. I stumble around on the dusty floor, turning dark corners and running into partying monsters. For the most part they seemed harmless, still aware in a way that they were people, but some of them seemed lost within the folds of monster flesh and these creatures are eating more than just candy. I spot them, stolen away behind shelving or barrels, eating limbs and faces of other monsters. I call Adam on my cell phone and ask him to come get me, I'm lost and can't find my way out, he tells me to stay put, that he's on his way. As I'm wandering around I run into my friend Carl. He'd just eaten some candy and started to transform into something odd. Only he doesn't see it, doesn't feel it, thinks I'm crazy and tells me I'm lying. I ask him where Natalya is and he says she's in another room and that he'll take me to her. When we get to the room she's sitting on the floor watching TV, her back is to us but from what I can tell she looks perfectly normal. I call out to her and she turns around and her eyes are missing. In their place is static, like the kind you see on a TV screen when the channel isn't coming in clearly, and she smiles at me and mouths words but she has no voice. I scream and run out of the room, down some corridor, and run smack into an ex boyfriend. He looks normal enough but he smells funny, like secrets and desperation. He's trying to smooth talk me but forgets how I know he's a liar so I don't fall for it, he tells me that he has a different kind of candy, one that won't make me into a monster but will make me into something amazing, I tell him I'm already amazing (ah, it's good to retain my wit in dreams). He offers it to me anyways, with his flashy smile and hungry eyes, and I tell him it's really good to see him again as I tip over shelving and it falls on his head. I turn around and there's Adam, looking worried and fascinated and he takes my hand and I wake up.
Then there's the one where there's a swamp inside my childhood home and in the swamp are water dwelling beasts who try to glamor me and my family. The water is oily and my parents are young, in their early 30's, and my sister has been kidnapped by the Swamp Queen and it's up to me to rescue her. There's a big battle that rages between the swamp beasts and my family, complete with torches and archery and canoes. It's muddy and slimy and everyone's skin is porcelain white and flawless and we're all beautiful and fit and warriors. I eventually kill the Swamp Queen by realizing she can be defeated if your heart holds no fear, I invoke her powers and glamor all of the swamp beasts and set them all on fire and my parents smile and dance in the amber light of the flames.
These are the dreams I'm having. But in real life things aren't as interesting.
The store that I run is closing soon and I'm going through impatience and anxiety as I wait for this to happen. About two weeks before the owner broke this news to me I had this revelation of what I want to do with my life, professionally speaking, and so the timing of all of this seems perfect. But also, too soon. I'm being vague, I know, but the ideas are still in the, um, baking phase so it seems too early to share my, uh, cookies.? Anyways, it's making me a little nuts, my brain is simultaneously processing the possible awesomeness of my ideal future and also quickly hiding away to a happy place that doesn't have dollar signs, potential for failure, and big scary responsibilities.
So, to clear my mind a little I'm going to be starting, or I should say restarting, a story that I've stopped and started and stopped and started and stopped and started for the last few years. But this time, in the vein of Sluggernut, I will be posting the chapters as I complete them, but this time on a dedicated website instead of this one. Before I tell you where you can find it or how often new installments will be published I need to polish up the first chapter a bit and make sure the website is fit for company. Fluff the pillows wipe the blood from the walls, you know.
And as my uncertain future ticks days off the calendar as loudly as a tolling church bell, in three weeks we will be entertaining and possibly kidnapping our delectable friend Vanessa who will be visiting us from Maine. I'm super excited and nervous as well, so much has changed in both our lives since last we sipped wine and plotted the earth's demise together in NYC, she's now a momma and I'm um, taller. And also I no longer live in NYC which means my death stare is a little less deathy. Maybe this is why I had a dream of her last night. Not as strange as the ones I regaled you with at the start of this post but surreal nonetheless. I was in Vegas wandering aimlessly through casinos looking for a bathroom. I spotted the ladies room and stationed in front of the door was an empty green felt card table with a sullen looking dealer dealing cards to no one. As I approached I saw that the dealer was Vanessa, she wore a red dealer's vest and didn't smile when she looked at me. The casino appeared pretty empty and the only noise was the quiet whisper of elevator music playing through the speakers. Adam was suddenly sitting at the table as well and we were both quiet as Vanessa told us how she likes to get away from it all by coming here, but that no one ever sits at her table. The dream seemed punctuated by silence and the only sound was the music which eventually revealed itself to be my radio alarm clock. I awoke with an intense urge to pee and briefly I thought to myself how foolish of me that I didn't use the bathroom at the casino.
Amazing writing, darling, but your depiction of my TV-posessed eyes is a little too eerily correct. lol This is your fault, by the way. No more introducing TV shows to me until after the GRE! So happy to be out of TV land and back into...School land? Ugh. Well, it's more intellectual at least. Stop dreaming creepy shit and go back to the apocalyptic shit already!
Why in hell, with all of our fancy, scientific know-how and extensive, wasteful spending, have we not come up with a way to record our dreams for playback at our convenience?!?!?!
i do love the extra oxygen pumped into casino air. the reason i didn't smile was because i've been having dreams about losing my teeth. it wasn't anything personal, promise!
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